Why are you in a space of nothingness right now? There are things at the core of who you are that have been there since the beginning. Since before you were ever in this world, you were created with a design.
Aside from just self-discipline, how do you cut back?
Look, God doesn’t care if you have things. He cares if that thing has you. What do I do with this pain? Because it sucks. Whatever you reach to when you’re stressed or anxious, that is your functional savior. God wants to bring back more into your life than that which was taken.
What does deep work mean? Because we hear all the time, do the work. And it’s an annoying term, at least to me, like do the work. It means like, You’re not there yet. You can’t meet me there yet. But what does do the work mean to you?
For me, it’s a very, very personalized experience where there are things at the core of who you are that have been, like I said, there since the beginning, since before you were ever in this world. You were created with a design. And coming into this world, both nature and nurture, both the environment physically that you were born in and those who loved you and structured your emotional framework and all that, either helped nurture that in the right direction, or they took it in a different direction, and they created a lot of additional work for you to now overcome. So with the work that I’ve done, and it’s not been easy, a lot of tears, a lot of going before the Lord and saying, All right, God, I’m done pretending and trying to be something or someone that I’m not. What do I do with this pain? What do I do with it? Because it sucks, and I’m tired of acting like it’s not there. When I talk about doing the work, that’s what I’m talking about.
So if someone hears this and they’re like, I’m ready to be more honest with myself, what does that look like in practical steps?
I would seek out. I would seek out somebody who you trust, either who has the character, the virtues, the life that there’s an essence to them that you desire to have. I would implore anybody on this call to reach out to that person and say, Hey, could I sit down with you for half an hour to share what’s going on? Like I said, it took me a long time to get to that point where I was willing to say like, I just need help. I just need help. Just by you externalizing that, I found, Eric, there’s so much power in just vocalizing and releasing it, as opposed to bottling it up. For all men, we need to reach out to each other. It’s so important.
When we want to reach out and do this, it’s so hard to get over that hump. And what’s a tip or an idea of how to just overcome that?
We’ve all struggled with social media being able to instantly compare yourself to 50 other people in a matter of 10 seconds. Well, this person can do this. This person’s amazing. Why am I not talented in music like Eric is? God, why didn’t I get that gift? Why don’t I have all of these stories that the devil just feeds on? So eliminating that, cutting back on that, if that’s something that you find is a vice for you or something that creates confusion about who you are, what your gifts are, I get to celebrate that I’m not going to be a Formula One race car driver like I wanted to be. I’m not going to be a fighter pilot like I wanted to be. I’m not going to be these people, and I’m really okay with that.
Aside from just self-discipline, is there any… Are you deleting Instagram occasionally? Do you just decide to set your mind I’m not going to look at? How do you.
Cut back? What I found was really helpful and simple for me to do. I do not get on my phone at all for the first 60 minutes of the day. Just don’t touch it. Don’t get on it at all. Whatever you reach to when you’re stressed or anxious, that is your functional savior. Even if you are professing that Jesus is your Lord, if he’s not Lord of all, he’s not Lord at all.
And so you’re saying that when we’re stressed and we need comfort, whatever we go to is our functional savior, aka God, right? We’re going to that forand that could be porn, it could be food, it can be internet, it can be sleeping, video games, any number of things. We’ve all done all of them or some of them. That’s fascinating. Okay, and so you get honest, you express that, and you say the burden becomes lifted. And then what happens?
I have to know where are my triggers? Where do I get susceptible? Where is the crack that I am? I’ve just said, Oh, no, it’s just how I am, or oh, no, it’s just like, this is what I was just whatever, it’s just snacking. It’s just a little evening snack. No, I’m that thing. Look, God doesn’t care if you have things. He cares if that thing has you. He doesn’t care if you have ice cream, but He does care if that ice cream has your heart and you’re going to that ice cream for that ice cream for something to satiate that can only come from Him. When I’m tired, I’m susceptible. When I’m hungry, I’m susceptible. And if I’m overwhelmed in a state of anxiousness, I don’t hands are the devil’s playground. And so if you’re idle, if don’t have anything to do, the devil is going to come in and meet you there and just have a field day. What is it? Why are you in a space of nothingness right now? And helping this person come back to a real deep level of responsibility and accountability of the choices they have made that have gotten them to the place that they are, whether good.
Well, both good and bad, and saying, Okay, what can we change now? What are practical things that we can change throughout your day? That you can start by just saying, We’re going to make it one day sober. Sobriety starts with one day. Sobriety is today. That’s it. So what do we need to do today?
So many things hit home. One of the things that rings true for me is purpose. And when I feel like I’m living a purposeful life and I have purpose, dude, vices just don’t have the… They just can’t get the claws into me because I’m living for a purpose.
I believe that there are certain things that have put inside of you, obviously, musically inclined. There’s a musical element that God sowed that into you, where you can see things, hear things that other people can’t. And I believe it’s to his glory that you pursue that, that you massage that and say, Okay, how can I use this? He’s given me a gift with emotions and relationships. I can see relationships, and I can have long conversations about them without getting tired. And my bandwidth is pretty wide for it. How can I use this to glorify you? Where is there a need? Where is there a place that I could insert myself and help bring people to know you better? Whether that’s through healing, whether that’s through music, whether that’s through pottery, that’s a really powerful thing.
You’re speaking to my soul, man. This is good stuff. If you could wrap this up into one solid message from your heart, what would you end with?
And I believe that anybody listening to this right now, God wants to bring back more into your life than that which was taken, whether it’s self-inflicted or not. God is the great redeemer, and He is wanting to redeem things in your life. Even, yes, the things that right now in your mind you’re saying, He could never redeem that. Yes, He can. And He will. You play a role in it. You surrender, you yield, you get around other men, you confess, and you receive the love and peace that He has, and He will redeem it.
So beautiful. Thanks, brother.
Thank you for having me, Eric. Truly a pleasure.
I hope you enjoyed this episode. More importantly, I hope you feel closer to your creator. If you find yourself wanting to strengthen your relationship with God, I’m a huge fan of the Skylight app. It’s full of beautiful, high-quality daily spiritual practices. Finally, never forget, in all things, God works for the good of those who love Him.
dyejo
Guest Author
